Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Holiday Contest


Hello out there!  I haven't been actively blogging due to other obligations, but I couldn't resist Susanna Hill's 2nd Annual Holiday Contest.

Here are the rules:

"Write a children's holiday story beginning with any version of "Dashing through the snow in a one horse open sleigh."  You may use that actual opening, or you may change it to any similar version '[Verb of your choice]ing through the [any substance you choose] in a [conveyance of any kind].'"

So here goes, to the tune of Jingle Bells. Warning: Silly and stupid story follows. 

How the Grinch Spends Christmas

Dashing through the snow
In Santa’s stolen sleigh
Over Santa’s toe
Laughing all the way. MUA-HA-HA!
Flying snowballs sting
I’m not at all contrite
How fun it is to toss and fling
The gifts into the night.

Oh, bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Trouble making – Reindeer MUSH!
In Santa’s stolen sleigh
Bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Trouble making – Reindeer MUSH!
In Santa’s stolen sleigh

This morning when I woke
I thought, “The fun begins,”
I’ll lick the cookies clean
Return them to their tins
Pluck festive door wreathes bare
Chop down Christmas trees
Cram stockings -- not the kind you wear --
With coal lumps to the knees

Oh, bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Shelf Elf shaking, snow globe breaking
Reindeer led astray
Bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Snowman baking, present taking
In the mall Santa’s toupee.

Whooshing far and near
Dropping water bombs away
Then, Santa calls his deer
And rats! They do obey
He hums a little tune
Shakes his head so slight
Nails me with the last balloon
And flies into the night.

Oh, bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Santa made my day
I think I saw him gloating
As he rode his sleigh away
Bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mean is in my genes
I can't wait for him to find
I fed his reindeer beans.

HA! HA! HA! Merry Christmas!

32 comments:

  1. MUA-HA-HA, you had me rolling here! Love this slant!

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    1. Thanks Joanna. I basically wrote the whole story around MUA-HA-HA -- I fell so in love with using that maniacal laugh.

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  2. I knew it would be amazing and fun! Super job, Margaret!

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  3. Excellent job, Margaret! Very entertaining, and what an ending!!! :) Hahahahaha! I'm so glad you entered :) Thanks for joining in the fun with your original story - it's so fun how different everyone's stories are, even though we all start from the same place!

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    1. Thanks Susanna! Yes, I agree it's amazing the variety of stories that were generated for this contest -- everyone has been so creative!

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  4. Margaret, a fun story. You are very good with rhyming. I enjoyed reading your entry.

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  5. What a great angle on a Christmas story. Very funny!

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    1. Thanks Carrie. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

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  6. "Shelf elf shaking, snow globe breaking"--HA! I love your tale of gleeful destruction! And your meter is terrific. Great job!

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    1. Thanks Deborah! I loved your entry too! -- very creative.

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  7. This story is loads of fun...I mean, mischief. Ba Hum Bug! Love the ending. That grinch is a real stinker for feeding the reindeers beans!

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    1. LOL. Thanks Romelle. It was fun coming up with naughty things for the Grinch to do.

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  8. Margaret...this is TOO FUNNY! The refrain ROCKS! I absolutely loved it from start to finish...and what a finish. :) Poor Santa!

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    1. Thanks Vivian. Yes, poor Santa -- I wasn't sure if it would be too much but I kept chuckling thinking about it, so I went for it! Loved your entry, btw -- great idea to mashup nursery rhymes!

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  9. You had me laughing all the way, too. MUA-HA-HA! :)

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  10. I laughed out loud at MUA-HA-HA! This is great -- you really nailed all the things that Grinchy does, and the rhythm and rhyme are superb. What a fun poem! (Glad the real Santa won out in the end, though...)

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    1. Thanks Beth! Glad you liked it. It was a fun poem to write.

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  11. Love this - it made me chuckle. Especially loved the last two lines!~

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    1. Thanks Jennifer. Glad you were not offended by the last two lines! :-)

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  12. Genius! So much fun! Had me giggling all the way through. I love the rhyme too. The beat is beautiful and the voice terrific. WHAT A SUPER DE DUPER job. :-)

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    1. Thanks Robyn for the kind words. I'm glad you liked it and so glad you stopped by to read it!

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  13. Great slant on a favorite carol! Congrats on making the finals.

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  14. Absolutely fabulous! How the Grinch Stole Christmas is my favorite Seuss book. You have captured mood of it excellently...and in perfect rhyme to boot! Love it!
    Congrats on the finals :-)

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    1. Thanks Penny! Congrats on being one of the winners. You story was one of my favorites.

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