Hello out there! I haven't been actively blogging due to other obligations, but I couldn't resist Susanna Hill's 2nd Annual Holiday Contest.
Here are the rules:
"Write a children's holiday story beginning with any version of "Dashing through the snow in a one horse open sleigh." You may use that actual opening, or you may change it to any similar version '[Verb of your choice]ing through the [any substance you choose] in a [conveyance of any kind].'"
So here goes, to the tune of Jingle Bells. Warning: Silly and stupid story follows.
How the
Grinch Spends Christmas
Dashing through the snow
In Santa’s stolen sleigh
Over Santa’s toe
Laughing all the way. MUA-HA-HA!
Flying snowballs sting
I’m not at all contrite
How fun it is to toss and fling
The gifts into the night.
Oh, bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Trouble making – Reindeer MUSH!
In Santa’s stolen sleigh
Bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Trouble making – Reindeer MUSH!
In Santa’s stolen sleigh
This morning when I woke
I thought, “The fun begins,”
I’ll lick the
cookies clean
Return them to their tins
Pluck festive door wreathes bare
Chop down Christmas trees
Cram stockings -- not the kind you wear --
With coal lumps to the knees
Oh, bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Shelf Elf shaking, snow globe breaking
Reindeer led astray
Bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mischief saves the day
Snowman baking, present taking
In the mall Santa’s toupee.
Whooshing far and near
Dropping water bombs away
Then, Santa calls his deer
And rats! They do obey
He hums a little tune
Shakes his head so slight
Nails me with the last balloon
And flies into the night.
Oh, bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Santa made my day
I think I saw him gloating
As he rode his sleigh away
Bah humbug, Christmas, ugh!
Mean is in my genes
I can't wait for him to find
I fed his reindeer beans.
HA! HA! HA! Merry Christmas!








